Steve is bringing SexyBack… to Walter?

steve-12_profile-circleSteve here. I was supposed to Skype with Basil last night, but he messaged me to say he’s not my boyfriend and never was – and then told me to leave him alone.

Why would he say that? The week that Basil visited was pure bliss. We’re perfect for one another. Basil was the fish in my treat, the milk in my bowl… my dream come true.

Or so I thought. Continue reading

Basil Worthington comes to Paris

Thank goodness Steve still hasn’t seen my Valentine’s Day post to him. He’s been too preoccupied… he’s in love. Again.

We have a visitor this week and Steve is completely smitten. His name is Basil Worthington and he’s what Steve calls “mature” and “cosmopolitan.” [I imagine that’s what Basil’s mom and dad were going for when they named him that.] Mr. Worthington is six and lives in a place called Louisville.

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Basil’s mom and dad hired a professional photographer to take pictures of him. [I think my moms’ pictures look just as nice.]

Basil’s parents took a trip and so he’s staying with us. Steve follows him around like a puppy dog. [I probably shouldn’t insult my brother like that, but I think my Valentine to him more than makes up for it.] Continue reading

A bag full of mixed nuts

Eggnog-06_profile-circleI’ve been biting my tongue, but someone needs to speak up, so I guess, yet again, it’s going to be me. Carol already thinks I’m a goody two-shoes anyway. This whole blog thing Carol started has careened out of control. We were a nice, quiet household until her blog. Just three dogs, four cats, two moms, and a person who abandoned us to go to college. But now we’re stuck in a soap opera. Let me sum up how ridiculous life in the “not-so-fast-lane,” as Carol puts it, has become: Continue reading

Walter vs. The Life Coach: The deconstruction of Steve

No word from Mr. Maury. I really hope he’ll have Willow on his show so we can get down to the bottom of who is the father [or are the fathers?] of Marmalade’s kittens!

In the meantime, Baby Girl’s been spending a lot of time at our window brushing up on her Life Coaching skills. Between Steve obsessing about getting Willow back, Violet’s food obsessions, and Ethel’s quashed singing aspirations, she has her paws full.

Baby Girl brought Ethel a copy of a book called “The Secret” and told Ethel that, if she does everything the book says, her singing career will come to her. Ethel’s had her nose in the book all weekend. At least it’s keeping her quiet!! I wonder if I read that book if I can “will” the General to stay off of my favorite sleeping spots? Maybe I’ll ask to borrow the book when Ethel’s done with it.

ethel-secret

Ethel ponders the awe-inspiring potential of The Secret.

Continue reading

Willow, you ??? the father…

Baby Girl came to see me yesterday with updates on her brother, Willow [Steve’s former boyfriend]. She’s been all over the neighborhood. She even enlisted the help of her sister, Bubbles, to gather information.

For starters, Willow’s spending more and more time with Greg and Cindy from FelExodus. He’s even talking about going on a retreat with Greg to learn how to “unleash his Inner Warrior.”

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Could this be Willow’s “Inner Warrior?” Doubtful.

Continue reading